A Psalm for Me Today

   I resonate with the title of the Psalm reading for today as given in the Good News Version of Psalm 69:

   A Cry for Help

   That is so often my prayer as I read and see how far I fall short of what I feel God would like for me to be. It is easy for me to see myself in comparison to the standards that He sets up for righteousness, and that picture is not too good.

   I had a friend tell me one time, in a comment to this blog, that I am too hard on myself, but he does not know the real me. I can see myself and I know myself deep down, not as good as God does, but better than someone looking from the outside. So here I am again today, comparing my life, as I live it out, to what I read about God's desire for my life.

   And so I read in this Psalm these words that ring true to me this morning:

   "Don't let me bring shame on those who trust in you, 
      Sovereign Lord Almighty! 
   Don't let me bring disgrace to those who worship you, 
      O God of Israel!"
   I do not want the things that I do, or the words that I say, lead someone in the wrong way. I do not want to just look good on the outside for my own self glorification, I just do not want the added shame of being an example that someone else might follow and be led in the wrong direction. It is enough that I do not measure up, but to bring someone else along with me, that is really bad.

   Reflecting on these verses almost want me to be a hermit. I could be by myself, in a spot where no one else but God would see me, and then I would not fall victim to this possibility. But I know that is not the way that God desires. He has put me in a place where my life is lived out before others. Whether it be in the church, or on the golf course, or at home, others are there and they see.

   Even when I go into the prison and look around me at the inmates put there for various offenses, I am aware of my own sins, and I do not want the things that I say to them, be a stumbling block to their picture of God's love for them. I often pray for the words to say that might be the right path to lead them to Him.

   So, it is fitting that I cry for help. Not to bring shame or disgrace on those who are Yours.

   Help!