The Rest of the Tim Tebow Story?

   What if I held a book in my hands, a 400 page book, and I wanted to read the story about a man who looked to become a giant in the Christian faith. But as I read of the successes in his early life, and I look forward to seeing how this life will play out, I get to page 200, and there is nothing there. The rest of the book is full of blank pages.

   When I read a book, like the one I have in my hands currently, Les Miserables, I see the story as it unfolds. I read about Jean Valjean, Javert, Cosette, Marius, and I know that as I read on, I will find out what happens to each of them. I know that book has an ending, the last few hundred pages have writing on them, and the story will be resolved. I just need a few more hours to read it and find out.

   I have followed the Tim Tebow story ever since he was the quarterback of the National Champion Florida Gators. His success on the football field and his outspoken testimony of God's work in his life, made him a Christian icon, and he was looked up to by millions. On to Denver he went, where he seemed to turn that team around and make it a championship contender. Then when the Broncos picked up Peyton Manning, they traded Tebow to the NY Jets.

   With much fanfare, the Florida quarterback came to New York and its relentless media hype. Then the story soured, and the last season was a huge disappointment, for the fans, for the team, for the media,  for his Christian followers, and, I suspect, for him as well.

   In my mind, and in my wishful projections, I want the story to be a great one of comeback, of God's vindication of his talents and his testimony. In short, I want him to taste success again on the football field, and for his personal life to triumph over the disappointments of the past year. That sounds like an ending that everyone would enjoy.

   But is that the way that God intends? He is not surprised by any of the things that have happened in Tim Tebow's life, and He knows what the rest of it looks like. His hand was in the days of success and in the days of the other. He alone knows the shaping of a life that goes through this emotional roller coaster of celebrity status. And He knows the outcome.

   What will be written on those last couple of hundred pages of this life?

   I can only hope and pray that the story of God's love and guidance will be brought out through the remaining pages. I want success for Tim, success in life and in service, no matter where or how it comes. I want to see him bowing on one knee in the end zone of life, lifting a had to God on high and giving Him all the honor and praise.

   If I could, I would just go ahead and write that scene of victory on the last page of the book, and then wait and see how all the other blank pages are filled in with a life lived in the right way and for the right reasons.

   Go Tim, and show us all how to overcome and live....

"They" and "Them"

   I think of people this morning. People all around me, coming into and out of my life all the time, some that I know the names they are called, some without a name to me, but that are there in my picture. What of those folk?

   Do I bear any responsibility to them? Are they just there, or there for a reason? Are they just a mass of humanity that are out there, or individuals with hopes and dreams, or despair and desperation?

   I think of the people that I saw as I was out early this morning:

   A man and woman out for their early morning walk,
   A woman on her way to work,
   A woman walking out to get her paper,
   A man putting his garbage can out for pick up,
   A man reading his newspaper,
   A man cutting the green on hole no. 2,

   Some of these I knew and  could call them by name, but some I did not, just realizing that they were people out there, and that they existed in my line of sight just then.

   I thought of the words that I had read in Scripture earlier before I went out:

   "Blessed are the..."
   "Blessed are those..."

   Eight verses in Matthew's Gospel referring to people.

   Then a quote that came to me from Thoreau:

   “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation"

   The complete opposite of those in the "blessed" category.

   So I ask more questions:

   Which am I, anyway? Is it just my curiosity that leads me to think about them at all? Do I care anything about them, whoever "them" are?

   Perhaps these are just the ramblings of a confused mind, but could they not be the answer to my prayer as I started my day, before the walking time?

   "God, please give me Your eyes to see and Your ears to hear, those in my world today"

   He did, and now what?

What Do I Not See in the Dark?

   One of the things I am constantly trying to do is to see life's lessons in my attempts at photography. Sometimes I see them but don't learn them well, but they are there nonetheless.

   I find that the camera sees more than I do, especially in night photography. I can take a shot on my regular settings, aperture, shutter speed and the rest and get a realistic picture, at least it looks real to me in regards to what it looks like when I took it. Take the example below.

   Then if I upload the pic from the camera into a processing program, fiddle with the exposure, the shadows and the clarity, the camera has shown me more than I realize. There are areas in the dark that now become clearer. There was actually something out there that I would have missed if I had just walked through the scene and gone on.

   Could that be the lesson that I need to learn in life? Are there areas in my life that could be seen a little clearer or in more detail if I took more time in looking? Are there things that would open up if I just opened my eyes?

   Just as I can lengthen the shutter speed on the camera, so can I spend more time in focusing on God, and what He wants in my life.

   Just as I can open the aperture as wide as possible to let in all the light it can, so I can open my eyes, and see what God wants me to know about Him and about His world.

   What I can do with a camera and a little time in processing may not hold a candle to what I can do with a little time and a willingness to open my eyes.

   Let it be.

Movies and Me

   Seven men sitting around a table, in a church meeting no less, and the question was put to all. "What is your favorite movie and why?"

   I must remind you that all seven were either church elders or church staff. What do you think the selections might have been? These in no particular order:

   Dead Poet's Society
   Jaws
   Tombstone
   Jeremiah Johnson
   Hoosiers
   The Longest Day
   and another that I cannot remember...

   I noticed something abut the list right off, there were no "religious movies" in the bunch. So why those selections?

   The "why was it your favorite" question helped shed some light on the selections, and the reasons were as varied as the people. By and large it was because a particular movie, or a scene from it, hit a person right where they stood in their life at that same time.

   I know, in my case, it was because I was about to start a new career as a teacher, and, like Robin Williams who played the teacher in the movie Dead Poet's Society, I wanted to have an impact on my students in a positive way. Now, I do not want to hold up the movie as being all positive, which is was not, at least to me, but it was more the idea that those boys in his class needed to be encouraged to think for themselves, to go beyond the rote learning of that poetry class and think.

   Williams was a maverick, in his style, in his ideas, and in his presentations. All of the above eventually get him fired, but his thoughts do take root in some of the class.

   I was fortunate that, although I did sometimes stand on the table to teach and do other non-orthodox things in my classroom, I did not get the pink slip. I also spent so much time on getting the students to examine and think about things, that I did not get much past half way in the textbook before the school year came to a close.

   My kindly principal probably rolled his eyes a few times, if he did hear about this class on the second floor, but I think he knew my heart was in the right place, even if my methodology was a little askew. Perhaps he saw a reason in my madness. Some of the kids got it, too, even though they were still in the 8th grade.

   Williams, as Mr. Keating, had fun, and I did too. Lucky for me I did not fall off the desk.

   Now does all of the above make sense enough to make that movie my favorite? Hope so because it was.

 

Envy or Effort

   There are times, not every day for sure, but times when I read a word in a Scripture reading and it just sticks with me, through the rest of the readings and through my walking period. I guess it is my word for the day, a word that God wants me to see myself in. Sometimes it is a "good" word, one that confirms for me that I am in the right place with the right attitude, but other times it is a convicting one, one that has a negative connotation for me, and one that I need to work on eradicating. 

   Maybe this word has not taken complete control of my life and thoughts, but there is the sense that it could. Better to confront the knowledge of it now, than to let it take more root.

   I read this in the first part of Psalm 37 this morning:

   "Fret not yourself because of evildoers;

    be not envious of wrongdoers!
    For they will soon fade like the grass
    and wither like the green herb."

   And the word that stuck with me as I walked was the word ENVY.

   On my initial reading of these verses I thought, "i'm not envious of people who do wrong, far from it. I don't want to go that way regardless."

   Then I thought, "do I covet what someone else has, or what they have a talent for, or for what their family situation is, or their health, or their position? Am I jealous of their perceived spiritual superiority?"

   Do thoughts such as these just display a sense of dissatisfaction with some part of my own life? Is it true that I would be happier, or better off, or more satisfied if I could transplant some of what some other person has, or I think he has, into my life and change my situation?

   I see a person with a smiling face, seemingly with everything that life has to offer in the way of good things, with position, with health, with a perfect family and I say to myself, "I wish I could be that guy".

   But then I think, "I do not know what his life is like when he shuts the door to his house, when he is alone with himself, or how his life really lays out. Do I know that I want that complete package? Am I willing to put in the time and effort that he has to reach those goals?"

   The opposite of envy is satisfaction, satisfaction as to what God has put in my life, people, things, abilities, situations, and I seem to operate somewhere between those two extremes.

   Is all envy necessarily bad? If it causes me to think about what I can do to put myself in a better position, it can be good. If I am just waiting for something to fall into my lap, without any effort on my part, it can to turn to full blown jealousy.

   God help me to see the difference and choose wisely.

   

   

Time and Opportunity

   This morning is one of those times where any spiritual lessons will be the result of what was on my mind when I woke up. It may be the cart driving the horse, but this is what impressed me this morning.

   I woke up with not too much time on my hands before an early morning meeting. Just a few minutes to open my computer, see what emails were waiting for me there, open the devotional thought for the day, and hop in the car and drive. So, my thoughts were on time, or the lack of it, to do an adequate job on prayer, study or writing.

   Then, as I drove into the Village for this meeting, my thoughts went back to yesterday and how time played a part in a pleasant experience on my part.

   Mayre had a hair appointment over on the other end of Brunswick late in the afternoon, and, since she is not driving now, I drove her over there. I knew I would have a few minutes to wait for her to finish, so I took my camera with some ideas in mind as to where I could go to practice using it. On the way, and not too far from the "hair lady's" house and shop, we passed by the Blythe Island Regional Park. I knew it was there, but had not thought to make that my experimental spot.

   You never know what is waiting in a particular time and place, there is just the opportunity to use the time and find out. So, I drove the couple of miles back to the park, parked and took my camera to see what was there. The park was almost empty of people, but the weather was beautiful, and I thought there must be something that would catch my eye to practice on.

   I walked out on the boat launching ramp, just to check out the surroundings and try to find a spot where I would not be shooting right into the late afternoon sun. Then I happened to look up and this was looking down at me.

   The pelican looked right at home, but, I thought, he did not know if I was supposed to be there. All he (or was it a she?) moved was his head. Of course he was 6 or 8 feet over my head, so there was no danger to him from me, so he just watched.

   Then as I walked along another walkway area, I noticed some other wildlife, sitting on the handrail.

   I guess I had never noticed this particular type of gull before, but he was very striking. With his gray or black head, red beak and other markings, he was just a picture waiting to be taken. After I got home and looked him (or her) up on the Internet, I discovered he was probably a Laughing Gull and a young one of those.

   As I was driving back to the "hair place", I thought of all the ways I could have spent, or wasted, those few "waiting" minutes, and I was happy that God had shown fit to put these two bird specimens in my path.

   I did not know what was out there, I only knew I had a few minutes and wanted to use them. The Time was there. The Opportunity was there. All I had to do was open my eyes to see the world around me.

   Maybe there is a spiritual lesson in this after all.

 

Pick up the Brush and Go

   How does God speak to me as I go into another day? Is it always through the quiet time in Scripture or in prayer or meditation?

   It can be that way, but, often for me, it seems like it is more in the things that I hear and see and experience out in my world. Let me illustrate in this way:

   When I woke this morning, I did not have much time before a breakfast meeting with a friend. I did take a few minutes to read a Psalm or two, then a short time of prayer, then I was off. I just prayed for my day, that I would be open to see and hear what He had for me this day.

   As I listened to my friend talk about his life right now, I found myself being thankful. First of all, because his work was picking up after a long slow period, and secondly for the blessings that I knew God had put in my life and my situation. There is nothing like hearing someone else speak of their life that causes me to appreciate mine.

   As I returned home I thought of the things that were on my calendar for today. I know that the day will hold more than just those, but these are appointments that need to be taken care of. I knew that there were others that would need attention, but just realized that flexibility needed to mark this day.

   So I get home and have a chance to sit down and finish my study, write and then get to the business of the day. But the business is sitting right here with me, and on my computer screen, and it is hard to concentrate on any spiritual aspect.

   There are the two pieces of mail sitting on my sofa, staring at me even now. They both point to calls that have to be made to get something straightened out. They might be inconsequential or they might be a problem, but I have to make the calls to find out and then deal with them with that information in hand.

   Then there is that email from my grandson, one that is filled with his thoughts, his questions and his conclusions. That needs my attention in a concentrated way. I want to answer those statements and questions from a college sophomore in an intelligent, loving and Christian way. I want what I say to have an impact and lead him in the right way, without turning him off to anything else that I might want to say in the future. He took the time to think and to write and I need to do the same.

   There is also a short video that I need to watch to prepare for a noon meeting with another friend. We are going to discuss the subject covered and I want to be prepared for this.

   So my day is partially covered, but even those things that I know need to be taken care of will have things inside them that I have not considered, and these will need attention. I can only paint this day with broad strokes right now, and I won't see the finished painting until the day ends, and, even then, some of it may carry over till another time. For sure, the things that fill my plate today will have some effect on tomorrow and the days that follow that.

   How will this day turn out? How will I handle the things that happen, especially the items that appear without warning?

   The only way for me is to ask for Help right now and to continue that plea throughout the day, leaving time to say Thank You at the end of it all.

   So, I ask for help right now in this time, and pray that I am sensitive enough to hear His voice as I move through this day, being able to look back at the end and see what that help has been, with thankfulness that it was there for me.

   Now to look forward to it all......

 

Reflections on Purpose and 3 Prayers for Today

   I'm not sure why it happens, but sometimes at the end of a day, my mind drifts back over the events of that waking period and wonder of any importance attached to my actions or thoughts. Then I fall asleep and wake up with the subject still there.

   Let's see, what did I do yesterday?

   Well, I slept late and then got up for breakfast. It was Sunday, but we were to have church in the park today, so there was no coffee to go make at church, and the service was not till 10:30, so there was no need to rush.

   Went to church then took care of the offering, then came home for lunch. Played 9 holes in the mid afternoon, ate a quick bit for supper, read some stuff on the computer, read some on my Kindle, then went to sleep.

  Pretty exciting, right?

   As I thought about it last night and again this morning, I wondered if anything I did yesterday made any difference, was there any purpose in the hours spent, or was it just a "ho hum another day"?

   As I sit here right now, I can see the first problem with this attitude and these questions. I don't usually write a blog on Sunday because of having to get up early and get to the coffee making. By the time I get back home, it is time to eat and get ready to go back before 9AM. There is no time to sit and meditate, just time to get it done.

   But I want to feel like there was a reason to my day, a reason for getting up and going and doing, a purpose in it all, not just a way to pass a few hours before I can get back in bed again.

   So, I start this new day with at least a small purpose, to get up early and contemplate the reasons for my disquieting thoughts from yesterday. Looking at some Scripture, thinking on what I read, praying for some direction or recognition of opportunities, this gets me thinking in the right direction.

   Then my two prayers for this day:

   "Thy Will Be Done"

   and

   "Show me my part in Your Story"

   and a needed third prayer:

   "Help"

Into Each Life...

   There is a saying: "Into each life a little rain must fall". From what I could find out, this refrain comes from a poem by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, entitled The Rainy Day, from whence comes this last verse:

"Behind the clouds is the sun still shining;
Thy fate is the common fate of all,
Into each life some rain must fall,
Some days must be dark and dreary."

   The tone of the whole poem, and particularly the connotation that is commonly meant when the line is used, is a negative one, saying that rainy days are bad things. But I don't know if that is necessarily true, especially in my case.

   Now I know that it may be true for those folks who have come to our island to have some beach time, or who have a morning tee time. They may feel that their weekend is shot and they should have stayed at home and saved the money. It may be true for the competitors in the SEC Golf Championship at Sea Island, and even the people who live here full time and only have this day in the week to work on outside projects, but when I hear the rain on the roof in the early morning, I think "this is a day in which I am not forced to take advantage of the great weather outdoors".

   Now, don't get me wrong. I love the climate here and the "almost always" good weather. There are many days of sunshine, of nice breezes off the ocean, and these afford the opportunity to be out and about in various forms of recreation. A little golf here, a little tennis there, some walking and biking thrown in for good measure. What is there to not like?

   Can there be too much of a good thing?

   Perhaps a rainy day is just a welcome break from the normal of life, a chance to sit back and catch up on things that need to be done, even if that does not involve much physical effort. Reading, writing, doing things that have been put aside for the sake of enjoying sunny skies. Now that is not all bad either.

   I can hear the comments of folks looking out their rented rooms this morning and seeing the raindrops splashing in the puddles, "no problem for you to say that, you are retired and don't have anything to do anyway, and besides, you have so much in the way of good weather, you are spoiled".

   And I reply, "that may be true, but even retired people who live in nice places need a break every now and then".

   We can even look forward to these kinds of days.

   I came across these lines in a blog post while searching for quotes about rain. This from a person who understood.

   "I don't think that I could ever live without the rain. It's lovely here all year long, just not for everyone."

   And then another Longfellow quote:

   "The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain."

A Reason for My "Likes"

   Why do I do the things I do, and why do I choose or like to do them?

   Why do I like to get up early?
   Why do I like the quiet of this time?
   Why do I read the things I do?
   Why do I like to walk and think about things?

   I could answer these questions in this post, but that is not where I am headed, at least I could give surface answers that look or sound good, but then I reflect on what one of my readings talked about.

 A question....Is there some disconnect between my time spent here in the quiet morning and my life lived on the other side of these minutes? Should there be more of a sense of a changed life that results from these few minutes?

   I read this prayer from the Moravian Text:

   "Lord, sometimes we separate belief from works
   love for You from love for others
   good news as spiritual path from good news as transformed society
   End this schism
   lead us to inner holiness and outer service
   professions of faith and protections for the least in our society
   and reverence of You and love for others
   Amen"

   So, I ask myself, "Does all of this reading good things, reflecting on God and His will for me, or praying for strength and guidance, make any difference? Is it just for me or is it beneficial to anyone else? Is it important, or just one of my "likes"? Do I live two lives, one in this room and in this time, and the other outside in my world?"

   I am encouraged to continue my observance of these quiet times, but also to let that spill over into the way I live with others. I sense that there is not much use in the former if the latter is not changed for the better.

   So, my prayer is for a life that lives out what I learn, a life that not only experiences God in the quiet times, but sees Him in the rest of life as well, and not only sees but serves.

   Amen

 

Voices in the Silence?

   I confess that a lot of the time I get caught up in what I am writing in this blog, who I think might read it, and the message that I want to get across. What escapes me, in the pursuit of all of this, is the fact that a message, especially one written down, can be taken in more than one way. In the examples used, in the stories put in, even the images used for some color, a message is sent, and sometimes it is either not very clear, or sends a contrary message to the one I meant. At best, it often sends an incomplete one.

   Although my purpose for all this blogging was to keep an online journal of my thoughts as I interacted with the Scripture that comprised my reading for that particular day, I confess that I look at the stats attached to the blog, wondering just how many people might have read what I wrote, and what their reaction might have been. Maybe it is pride that makes me look at these, but I look for correction of ideas and thoughts as well as "right on" messages.

   There is a thumbs up sign right below the facebook entry for each post that shows a person likes what has been written, and sometimes people do check that. Sometimes there is even a comment or two, but not too often. My suggestion for the facebook page is to put a check box at the end, just to say, "I read it".

   After I finish the blog in the mornings, I read it to my wife, and, in her impartial reply, she gives me the thumbs up and tells me how great it is. Then I know I am OK to go and post it. After almost 55 years of marriage, we do tend to think alike on most issues and topics. If she and I think like this, it must be right, Right?

   So I learn that after finishing up and posting a great piece of literary work, that the loud silence does not indicate much. Is it accepted, is it ridiculed, is it food for thought, or is it rejected? If I keep to my original purpose, it should not matter. It is supposed to be an interaction between God and me. That should be enough, and if it just a figment of my imagination, then it is not worth much anyway.

  In this new photo software program I am trying to learn how to use, the is a section in the library, after you have imported the new pics from the camera card, you have the option to go through all the images and mark the ones you like, the ones you want to reject and delete, or leave them blank and decide later whether to keep them or not. If a particular photo falls into this latter category, there is nothing to mark, just a passive moving on to the next one.

   Perhaps it is the same when we read what someone else has written, think it is good and mark it thusly, realize that it is bad, or at the least, off base, leave a comment or just move on. Or we are all so busy that we move on regardless?

   It should not matter in the long term scheme of things, but I still wonder.

   Do I hear voices in this silence?

 

America

   I woke up this morning with these words and music going through my mind, a song by Katherine Lee Bates:

O beautiful for spacious skies,
For amber waves of grain,
For purple mountain majesties
Above the fruited plain!

America! America!
God shed His grace on thee,
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!

   I can still see the image in my mind as I heard the music, an image of a person taking a picture, probably me, being overcome with emotion as he thought of the music and not being able to focus, either his mind or his camera, on the subject.

   We like to sing these patriotic songs, especially at a time when our country seems in peril from sources that we cannot see or understand. The words give us a sense of hope and togetherness, and a feeling of "all will be OK again".

   But can we sing with hope the words "God shed His grace on thee" when, as a nation, we more and more leave Him out of any equation of national life?

   I knew the words to the song printed above, but I was amiss as to the title. I thought it might be America, but when I looked the lyrics to that up, I got this one, a song written back in 1832 by Rev. Samuel Smith, entitled My Country Tis of Thee:

My country, 'tis of Thee,
Sweet Land of Liberty
Of thee I sing;

   The first four stanzas I knew and had sung, but then there was more, four more to be exact, and included in those other four are two that might give us a clue as to where we are today in our national life. Smith penned:

Our glorious Land to-day,
'Neath Education's sway,
Soars upward still.
Its hills of learning fair,
Whose bounties all may share,
Behold them everywhere
On vale and hill!

Thy safeguard, Liberty,
The school shall ever be,
Our Nation's pride!
No tyrant hand shall smite,
While with encircling might
All here are taught the Right
With Truth allied.

   How can we ask God to bless us and shed His grace on us, when we have shut Him out of most of our educational life?

   Can I, or we as a people, stand and sing, even with patriotic fervor, My Country Tis of Thee, or God Bless America with true meaning, while disconnecting ourselves from Him in this vital area.

All here are taught the Right
With Truth allied.

   Great words to sing, but empty if they are not lived.

   Little wonder that we don't sing all the stanzas. We might see where we are.....

   God, help us to wake up.

Boston

   What was my reaction to the events of yesterday? The tragedy in Boston happened, and as I looked back on it this morning, I tried to think of my feelings when I heard the news, and as I watched the videos on the Internet.

   Reactions occur on many different levels, most relating to the time that has elapsed since the event and since my hearing the news.

   Initially, I felt the shock of the event. I saw and heard the terror of the scene and of the people that were caught up with all of it at the spot it happened. As the newscasts played and replayed the videos, I had the sense that all of our lives had changed.

   Then I thought of The Harbinger book that I had read a few weeks back. Was all of this another of the warnings of God directed at America, and what did all of this mean for my life and those that are close to me?

   As quickly as possible, I wanted to put all of this behind me, to get on with my life as usual. After all, I probably did not know anyone that was there, and the event happened many miles from where I was, so how did it affect me? I got on with life as I knew it, dinner, work on a project, crossword puzzle and sudoku and then a little light reading and to sleep.

   But then as I awoke this morning, the whole thing was there. Even as I looked at the Psalm reading for today, the words written about evil men put me right back in yesterday. What was the message? I had written yesterday that Monday, April 15th was an unknown path that I would walk down, not knowing full well what would its call on my life would be. It was the same for everyone alive that day, as this new day would be.

   I did not want to put my head in the sand and go on as if yesterday had never happened. There was meaning there. If nothing happens without a reason, I wanted to at least look and see if it spoke to me on some level. I could only speak for myself as I tried to listen. My thoughts are all I can write about, I do not know what all of this says to someone else.

   God allowed all of this to happen, and He alone sees the big picture. How do I live in light of that?

   If it is a warning to this country, and if that warning is for me, what do I do with it now?

   It is 2 Chronicles 7:14 again:

   "if My people who are called by My name humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin and will heal their land."

   Then it is the part of an old hymn, mentioned in the Moravian Daily Text for today:

   "Breathe on me breath of God
   until my heart is pure
   until with you I will one will
   to do or to endure"

   There is a personal aspect to the whole series of events and a personal responsibility to have the proper response.

   I need to begin there before I spend more time in looking for reasons and causes.

   So, as I pray for all those that are hurting this morning, I ask also for wisdom and insight into my life, so as to be a healer and not a destroyer.

   My part in this story may be almost non-existent, but let it be in Your Will, Oh, God.

The More I Think I Know

   Our pastor has been talking for a few weeks now, about Stories, our individual stories and their part in the big story of God. He has a way of making this subject seem simple when he talks about it, but then when I get home from church, let that subject rest for a few hours, and then think on it again this morning, I find it hard to get my mind around it.

   All of these billions of individual story lines, woven into the Big Story of God's Plan, how is that all possible? How does the story hold together? Why does my tiny part really matter anyway?

   I can see so little, only where I am at this very moment and perhaps a little into where I have been in the immediate past. I cannot see the threads of all these story lines, where they have been woven together in the past, how they fit together now, and where they are headed.

   It can be easy to look at life's happenings as just so much chance. Like "he just happened to be in that place at that time, and these other people were in the same spot and this and that took place and the whole of one's life was dramatically altered". How do we get into our minds that all was orchestrated by God, and that it is all for some purpose, maybe even a purpose that will come to fruition many years down the road.

   When I step out into a new day, do I realize that I have never walked in this day before. Although I will do things that I have done, that I will go to places that I have visited before, and that it may seem routine, as I sit here and write and think, I really do not know even the story of these next few minutes.

   It may be a lesson in futility to even try to think about all of this, but it also puts a humbleness in my mind to try, knowing that the more I think I know, the more I realize that I don't.

   So, I will just try to keep my eyes and ears and heart open today, and live it a moment at a time, looking for those characters in my story that are there for a reason and trying to hear from God as to how I am supposed to live on this unknown path.

   Help

Sand Gnats, A Spiritual Lesson

   As I walked early this morning, noting that it was not too early for the bugs to come out, I wondered to myself why God made pesky insects. Around here we have sand gnats, or no-see-ums, which come out in profusion when the temperatures are right. Some people are really bothered by them, but I seem to have developed some immunity to their bites and do not seem bothered after the initial sharp puncture of the skin.

   I thought, as I got back home, that I would look for some references, somewhere, as to what good these small mites do in the world. Surely they were created for something other than a nuisance.

   All of this led me on another rabbit trail. Several years back, when we first moved south from Chattanooga, a "knowledgeable person" told me that the sand gnat did not actually bite, but just secreted an acidic compound that made it feel like a bite. Sounded good to me, so I have proceeded over the years to pass on my newfound expertise to many others that needed to be enlightened on that particular subject.

   So, when I started looking on the internet for any good property for the lowly gnat, all the articles talked about the sand gnat "bite". Did they actually bite, and had I been spreading false information all this time? Not one time did I see anything about that drop of acid on the skin, and now I began to get worried.

   Then I found this other blog and read:

    Sand gnats don't just puncture your skin like mosquitoes do. Instead they rip it open using sharp cutting teeth located on the mandible. After inserting two sharp, sword-like blades into the skin as anchors, the sand gnat uses the cutting teeth to rip up the skin and get the blood flowing. As if that weren't enough, the gnat then squirts a chemical into the open wound to inhibit blood clotting. The tiny pool of blood that forms is then sucked up through a straw-like structure called the proboscis. Some human victims have allergic reactions to the chemical and must endure itchy red spots or even swollen welts.

   Partial vindication...maybe there was something to that chemical reaction, at least it fit in with my early discovery. Looks like there was a biting involved but also a secretion.

   So, I had gotten away from my original quest to find something good about the sand gnat, but maybe I had learned something else in the process. Beware of spreading false or misleading information.

   At least in the case of the little pest, this information may not be life threatening, but what about more important things, even spiritual. Maybe there are at least two things that I should do.

1. check my sources

2. don't try to look good by sharing "new" information

   Or possibly another one: "Keep your mouth shut"

   Has to be a spiritual lesson in all of this somewhere, Right?

   Right!

 

 

Lightroom and life

   Lightroom is an Adobe Photoshop application that is used for organizing and working with images. When I take photographs, I can download them directly from the card on my camera into the computer where the software program takes over. There is only one trouble with all of this. I can't seem to learn what to do to develop a consistent workflow so that I can actually do what i want. Lightroom seems to have a mind of its own, and, once I learn one thing about using it, another thing shows itself and I'm lost again.

   Fortunately for me, my neighbor a few doors down knows this program and is willing to give me some help on using it. But even this may have its limits. If I don't grasp it pretty soon, even he may make himself scarce when he sees me coming, and I would not blame him at all.

   I thought of all this as I took a few minutes to pray this morning. My prayers seem to be repeating themselves over these days. There are things that I am concerned about, and I seem to keep coming back to them each and every day. Most of these are in regard to my life and how to live it at this stage. I want to do my best for Him, for my family and for my growth in His grace.

   Then the thought hits me. Will God get tired of my continual asking for help? He knows me and He knows what I need. Should I have to keep on asking or maybe one day see the whole picture and master the program?

   Just as I tell my neighbor, "don't give up on me, I may understand it all one day, but right now I need help", do I say the same to God?

   And I thought maybe life would get easier at this point, but I'm still behind the curve on learning how to operate.

   I need help and I need it soon, on both fronts.

A Learning Experiment

   This morning as I woke up, I realized that I had a few minutes to sit and think and pray before eating breakfast and rushing off to a meeting at church. I thought about the meeting that would happen in a few minutes, and my role in it.

   Then these thoughts:

   A few years back, a man introducing me to another person, said, in effect, that he respected me because of my wisdom. Now I know that he might have done this, and probably so, in order to make me look good, but I have never felt that this wisdom thing was my forte. In fact, I find myself often speaking up in a group, in order to say something that might make me appear wise, when, in fact, I don't feel any wisdom, just a hint of pride in looking that way.

   So, as I prayed about this upcoming meeting, and what my role might be in it, I found myself formulating an experiment of sorts. I wondered what might happen if I only spoke out when prompted by something other than selfish inclinations, that God might lead me as to when to speak and how to make the words true to what I felt, and not just what I thought others would want to hear. In short, I would endeavor to speak truth, as I saw it, and leave it at that.

   There is an old saying that goes something like this "Hold your tongue and let others think you are wise rather than open your mouth and prove to them that you are not", and I resolved to go in that direction.

   So I went and tried to remember my thoughts from that brief early time. I tried not to speak just because everyone else had an opinion on a matter. I tried not to just agree and be in step with the group. If I had something I felt was pertinent to the conversation, I spoke, but otherwise just kept silent.

   In a group of 6 men, it is noticeable when one has little to say, so, before long, others began to prompt me to speak, or ask my opinion on a matter. Even as I did speak, I tried to measure my words carefully and thoughtfully, to add something to the conversation, and not to just respond.

   After the meeting adjourned, I thought about my experiment. It was hard to stay quiet some of the time, but, looking back on the whole thing, I felt that I had at least spoken from what I believed and not just what others might praise as wisdom. What I said may have not revealed any wisdom on my part, but being quiet may have a wisdom all its own.

   That was the conclusion that arose from that one experiment.

    "Jesus tells us one day we will have to give an account for every idle word that passes our lips. By our words--idle or not--we will be justified or condemned. "

   At the very least, words not spoken can't be classified as "idle", and that is a plus.

   Could be the dawning of a new day. Now to remember what has been learned.

   

Waiting Impatiently for....

   Last week we spent a couple of days on Kiawah Island with our son and part of his family. Their house was only a short walk from the beach, and so I wanted to get up early and see the sunrise as that new day dawned. It might be a Kodak moment, and I did have my camera with me, but without an alarm clock, I did not know if I would wake up in time to catch that event.

   But I did wake up early, and I did get to the beach just as the sky was beginning to lighten. Since I don't wear a watch, I did not know the time, nor did I know what time the sunrise was predicted to be, and so I waited. I found a spot on a ramp built over the dunes, a place where I could rest my camera on the railing and get a steady shot since I had no tripod, and I waited. And I waited.

   I took several shots of the sky as it changed its pastel colors. I anticipated the spot where the sun would rise out of the ocean, and I waited.

   As the world around me began to lighten, I wondered if the sun was somehow hidden behind some clouds that I could not see. Was it already up, and I could not see it? Was my waiting in vain? Had the moment passed me by?

   Then an arc of orange broke out of the sea, and as it slowly rose in the east, I took a bunch of shots with various camera settings and wondered why I had been so impatient. I knew the sun would rise on its schedule, I knew it was out there, I just wanted it to hurry up and present itself so I could get what I came for.

   This morning, as I walked early and saw the sky in the east beginning to get brighter, I thought of that other morning of last week, and I thought of that time as a microcosm of my life at times. I am impatient with people and impatient with God.

   Then I realize, even as I pray for what I think are the right things in my life, that I am operating on my time schedule and not His. Does He not want to give me a deeper knowledge of Him? Does He not want me to be confident in my life with Him? Does He not want to give me direction for my life? Does He not want to give me those attributes that would make me a better disciple?

   And just now I think about that sunrise. There is a timetable, and it is not mine.

   And I pray, "Thy Will Be Done"

   and wait impatiently for patience.....

Characters from Life and Fiction

   I'm not real sure that I can put all of this together this morning, but I will try.

   The Gospel reading for today concerned Joseph of Arimathea and Nicodemus taking the body of Jesus and giving it a burial in the garden tomb. As I read, I wondered what these two men were thinking at that time and what happened to them after that. They are both mentioned briefly earlier in the Gospel story, but they pass through the scenes of Jesus' life fleetingly and then are not heard from again. They both had a lot to lose in terms of prestige in the Judea of that day, but we just don't know.

   Then I think of characters in the book I am reading. I have read Les Miserables before, way back in high school, but am making my way through it again. The author, Victor Hugo, paints his characters in such detail, that there is no doubt the way they think and act and the whys of their ways. Sometimes, in excruciating detail, their thoughts are examined so as to leave no doubt about them. The reader can see their faces, read their minds, read their expressions, and know their hearts. They are an open book, literally.

   Then I think of people in my story, people that I think I know well because I have been around them for years, watched them grow up and become the way they are today. But do I really? They can talk to me about their lives, and I can watch what they do, but it is only through what they choose to reveal that I can see into their minds or hearts.

   I wonder to myself, why do I even want to know about these characters? Is it just idle curiosity or something more?

   It may be just that curiosity that causes me to want to know more about those Gospel characters and the complete story of their lives. Maybe, in their case, I would like to have some direction from the way they lived as an example for me in situations that I might find myself in.

   I do not have to wonder much about Hugo's characters. They are spelled out in great detail. They can give me insights into my own life, as I see myself in them, but they are just in a fictional story and the author can make them come out any way he chooses.

   Then there are those that I know well. Why do I want to know about them? Curiosity or more? Could I give some earned wisdom in those situations in their lives that I have lived through, whether in failure or victory? That would be the noble reason, I think.

   I can learn from those stories that I read about, whether in the Bible or in a work of fiction, but I can only interact with those that God has placed in my life, in my story. My prayer is that I would take the time and have the concern about those that I know, to be a presence in their lives for good. I pray for wisdom in dealing with those that He places here, where I live, so that God's story is carried out in all of our lives.

   As Hugo breathes life into his story people, so much more does God do the same for us. Hugo's characters have no choice in the matter, but God does give me choices, and I want to make the ones that add to the story of His love and grace, not take away from it.

   Let me live a life of Reality not fiction.

Reflections on Travel and People

   OK, we are home again. Several miles of driving over the past week, several different friends and family members visited, and sleeping in a lot of different beds. So, what do I remember as I sit here in the quiet of this new day?

   Most of all I think about people, friends from long ago and newer ones from the past few years. I think about family and the lives that they lead also. The places that we traveled to did not seem that important, it was the lives of those that we interacted with that seemed to hold my attention.

   As I thought about these folks, some of which I have already written about, I contemplate what I really know about each one. It is like having "friends" on Facebook. I can only see what they choose to let me see about their lives.

   If one chooses to post on that social media what new things that they have done or accomplished, that is what they have wanted each of their friends to know. That seems to be how they want their lives evaluated. Likewise with homes or cars or any of the stuff that they collect, as well as who they know or hang out with.

   It is the same when we sit down and visit with people. The only way I can see into their true lives is through what they reveal and what I observe. I cannot know all of their struggles and joys. I cannot know how they feel about their family situations, whether that be good or bad.

   All of us wear masks to some degree. We want to look good to those that surround us in life, while, maybe on the inside, we are hurting. We may want to appear successful in life, when, in reality, we know we are failing in the really important parts.

   It seems, that through all the miles and places of this past week, the parts that stick out to me are the times that we sat down and visited with our friends and family. Relationships are important, and that is what makes life. We interacted with scores of folks in these days, from those "living the good life" to those grieving over the loss of a loved one, or stuck in a nursing home.

   But then, how about me. How many masks do I wear, with one to fit every occasion?

   God knows the real me, as well as the secret lives of all that we have talked with over these days. I can only listen to talk and observe the walk of others, but I want mine to truly reflect His Love and His Grace.

   Not in just words, either.

A Tale of Two Ladies

   As we continue on our travels today, I take some time to look back on the experiences of yesterday.

   We made a couple of visits, one in Knoxville and one here in Chattanooga, to two ladies, both of which we had known for a long time, and who were, and still are, important in our lives.

   The first was a friend that had come into our lives when we were first married. We lived in Knoxville then, starting our first job, beginning our lives together in a new city, with new challenges and our future stretched out before us.

   I have often heard it said that we can choose our friends, but God chooses our neighbors. Well, this lady was one of our new neighbors, and has been one of our friends for many years. God put her and her husband in our lives in that formative period, and we were the better for it.

   Now she sits in an assisted living facility in Knoxville. Her mind is failing as well as her mobility, but she was excited to see us. We had a good time, remembering and laughing together, and it was good for all of us. We knew, when the visit ended and we drove back to Chattanooga, that it was a visit that we were supposed to make, for us and for her. We were blessed and felt that we had brought her some measure of joy also. That is a good way to leave a visit, one that had a purpose for all.

   As we came back into Chattanooga, we stopped and spent some time with another lady, one who, with her husband, had been important in our lives when we lived here. We had served together in a couple of churches and done ministry together up in the mountains of East Tennessee at a Christian camp.

   This lady is still active, gets around well, has a good mind as well as a beautiful voice. She lives alone, but God has allowed her to have some of her children and grand children close by, as well as giving her avenues of service in her church.

   We spent some time together, remembering old times and people from our collective pasts, and it was good. It was fun, and, I believe each of us felt good about the time we spent together.

   Just the thinking back on yesterday made me realize how taking some time to be in touch with others who have been important in our lives, can be a blessing, both to them and to us. God gives us these opportunities, and when we follow His leadership, and take the time, he rewards our efforts.

   Now we travel again today, moving on down into South Carolina to be with family for a couple of days. What are the opportunities there? Where and how does God lead? Will we be open to ministry and blessing?

   He gives us the time, and He knows what today will bring. I pray that we will be ready.