What is My Calling for Right Now?

   The week past has been a strange one for me. What started out on a high note last Sunday, ends up on this Sunday to be a time that I did not count on. Everyone said, "this will be a snap, and you will be about your normal life right after it is all over". But it did not turn out that way and I sit here, missing church, thinking about the whole thing.

   This morning I woke up early, a time that has eluded me these past few days, when all I wanted to do was stay in bed, in the warmth of the covers. I got up quietly without waking my wife, went into my study and prepared to read the Scriptures for today. It was then that I realized that my glasses were still in the bedroom, but I did not want to go back in there for fear of waking her up, so I just dressed and went for a walk in the wind and the dark.

  As I walked, I just asked God to enter my thoughts and give me some insights into what my life should look like right now. I had spent so much time over the past 6 days thinking about myself and how I felt, that I needed His perspective. Mine was too skewed.

  I was reminded, as I walked, that this was Palm Sunday, the day Jesus went into Jerusalem, riding on a donkey, with the people applauding Him. Even though all of this was going on, Jesus knew what the week following was going to bring. It would be a hard week, but, even though He knew, He went anyway, suffered the hurt and shame, and then rose victoriously on the other side.

   Jesus knew the future, I do not. If I knew, what would I do? It would be easy to thank God for telling me what was to happen, but then say that I do not want to live the hard times.

   Then, later on in the morning, as we watched church on the Internet, the pastor used some of the same logic as he talked about Palm Sunday. I thought "this is really for me, these thoughts all tie together and make sense". I will try to just live one day at a time, without worrying too much about what the future holds. I will listen for my calling for right now, try to live it and take the next things as they come.

   The pastor asked the question "What do you love?" The answer to that is your calling from God, at least for the season at hand. Follow that, even though you do not know where it will lead, or what will happen along the road.

   So, I forgot about myself for a little while and felt better for it.

   One verse from the Psalm reading this morning:

   "Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good;
for his steadfast love endures forever!"