A Disquieting…..

   Walking into my study room, really an unused bedroom, I noticed an envelope on the dresser, one that I had placed the name on the outside, but did not have an address with which to send it. Realizing that I had an email on the computer from last night that gave me that address, I opened the laptop and searched for that email. Finding it, I put it on a note, so as to remember to mail the card, and glanced at the inbox to see what else was there.

   I noticed a message from a site called I commit to Pray, a prayer site of The Voice of the Martyrs, which encourages Christians to pray for other believers around the world who are facing hard times and persecution. I had signed up some weeks back to receive these messages, but this morning felt led to actually read the story. Sadly, I had been in the recent habit of just deleting these emails, just not taking the time to care about these people. When you sign up on a site called "I Commit to Pray" and then don't, something is wrong.

   Then the questions come:

   Why don't I pray?

   Do I really believe that it is important?

   Do I believe that there is power there in that place of prayer?

   Is it just a religious exercise for me?

   Do I really connect with the One that I pray to?

   Are my prayers just thrown out there on the wind with a hope that there is something or someone out there that hears and cares?

   My pastor, in a meeting yesterday, spoke about a book, The Circle Maker, that changed his life and thinking on all of this, and I knew that my life needed that change.

   So I downloaded the book on my Kindle and began to read.

   After only one chapter I can't report on a new prayer life, or even a new understanding on its importance, I can only report on an act of obedience to a prompting and a seeking after answers to those questions that disturb my spirit this morning.

   And a prayer that God will guide me through His Spirit into what He wants for my life.