A Movie, A Tombstone, A Poem, A Verse and A Prayer

   I feel inadequate this morning.

   There have been several things that have brought thoughts to my mind over the past few days, but I don't know how to explain them. In my mind, I see how they fit, but will they just appear to be random to anyone else?

   They all relate back to the same subject, but how do I string them together?

   Perhaps they will pull themselves together as I put them down.

   Perhaps not, but that is a chance I have to take. These thoughts do not have to see the light of day, except for me, and this writer does not have to hit the "publish" button at the top of the page. They can be just filed away in the Drafts folder and left there.

   But here goes anyway....Let's see what happens...

   I ran into a friend the other day. He related how he and his wife had been watching a movie on line. He had wanted to tell me about it, but did not know if it was the right thing to do. I said, "send me the title in an email, and let me take a look at it".

   The movie, which I streamed on Amazon, was entitled Still Mine, the story of a Canadian farmer whose wife had developed Alzheimer's, and their journey down that road. Even though that is not a diagnosis that fits our situation exactly, there are similarities.

   It was a true story, acted out well on the silver screen, and it hit me.

   I wanted to handle life situations like that man, with courage, with compassion, and with a conviction that God had called me to be a Christian husband that loved his wife.

   And that mirrored the wedding vows, Dr. Robertson McQuilken wrote about in his little book, A Promise Kept..

   "In sickness and in health, Till death do us part"

   I went back in my mind to a tombstone I saw on Barbados. One that I have mentioned before, which read:

   "She showed how a Christian woman ought to die."

   I wanted my epitaph to reflect the sentiment:

   "He showed how a Christian man loved his wife".

   I felt called to be that man, however weak and imperfect my example was.

   But wait, that movie was not all that has been in my mind these days.

   I go back to a poem in McQuilken's book, entitled Lord Let Me Get Home Before Dark, which contains these words:

"It’s sundown, Lord.
The shadows of my life stretch back
into the dimness of the years long spent.
I fear not death, for that grim foe betrays himself at last,
thrusting me forever into life:
Life with You, unsoiled and free.
But I do fear.
I fear the Dark Spectre may come too soon
– or do I mean, too late?
That I should end before I finish or
finish, but not well.
That I should stain Your honor, shame Your name,
grieve Your loving heart.
Few, they tell me, finish well . . .
Lord, let me get home before dark."

   Not to grieve the heart of God, but to finish well, all of life's challenges, right up to the end.

   Those same words were posted in a blog post by a friend in VA just the other day. Coincidence? I think not.

   Then lastly, I think, a verse that I want to paraphrase out of my Psalms reading on this past Sunday. David writing in Psalms 69:6:

"May those who wait for Thee not be ashamed through me"

and:

"May those who seek Thee not be dishonored through me"

And, I pray, "God let me be the man you want me to be in all of life's situations, and let me also get home before dark"..

   Amen